How to make a Great "First Impression"

How to make a great first impression

I believe making a " Great First Impression" is very important in building relationship with others. It is important because that very "first impression" can make a person to either like you or hate you.[ It's also important because it can help you to get a job if you can make a good first impression to your employer, to get a date, and make more friends ... ]

The reason why the " first impression" can make a person to either like you or hate you because--"It takes just a quick glance, maybe three seconds, for someone to evaluate you when you meet for the first time. In this short time, the other person forms an opinion about you based on your appearance, your body language, your demeanor, your mannerisms, and how you are dressed." -Mindtool.com


Mindtool also states that " the worst and could be the great things first impression is that it can be nearly impossible to reverse or undo" and " making those first encounters extremely important, for they to set the tone for the all the relationships that follows"

Therefore, it is very important to present or behave yourself good whether you are in business setting or at a social event; always make Good First Impression !!

Below are the tips that i get from the article, "Make Great First Impression", Mindtool.com:

<b> Be on Time</b>

" Someone you are meeting for the first time is not interested in your "good excuse" for running late. Plan to arrive a few minutes early. " -mindtool

--The very first thing to do in order to make a good first impression is being on time. Being on time or early by allowing your self panty of time to avoid unexpected thing happen on the way there-- delay traffics, making a wrong turn, or unable to find the address. In my case of making first impression for my interview at Bank of the West is I showed up 30 minutes early. I can tell that my manager was very impressed--he came to me with a big smile and acknowledge my effort of showing up on time.


<b>Be Yourself, Be at Ease</b></b>

"If you are calm and confident, so the other person will feel more at ease, and so have a solid foundation for making that first impression a good one" -mindtool.com

--Relating to my interview, my manager he was at ease and calmly asking me questions about my hobbies and my past job experience, He has helped me feel comfortable and I didn't feel nervous at all during the interview.

<b>Present Yourself Appropriately</b>

".. physical appearance matters. The person you are meeting for the first time does not know you and your appearance is usually the first clue he or she has to go on " -mindtool

" The key to a good impression is to present yourself appropriately.
They say a picture is worth a thousand words, and so the "picture" you first present says much about you to the person you are meeting" -mind tools

--I always make sure I look my best--going to the interview in my case. I prepared what I was going to wear a day before. I make sure everything look nice and neat, and decide on what to do with my hair and make up.

And make sure you dress apart-- While my week internship at real estate company, Friday dress code is business casual. I didn't know that and so I wear a business suit to work while everyone is in jeans and casual, it made me feel uncomfortable the whole day I was there 

<b>A Winning Smile</b>!

"Smile and the world smiles too.. A warm and confident smile will put both you and the other person at ease. So smiling is a winner when it comes to great first impressions. But don't go overboard with this – people who take this too far can seem insincere and smarmy, or can be seen to be "lightweights"--mindtool
that ''
- Smile while at the person you meet the first time. I think sometime if you don't smile at the person that you meet for the first time, they will categorize you as a not nice( or meany) person. or at least in my case when I was at an interview with a real estate company, the vice present of the procurement was there to observe the interview. the whole time she looks so serious and does not smile for once. I was so nervous, and making the person conducting the interview very nervous too.

 
<b>Be Open and Confident</b>

"...body language as well as appearance speaks much louder than words."

Use your body language to project appropriate confidence and self-assurance. Stand tall, smile (of course), make eye contact, greet with a firm handshake. All of this will help you project confidence and encourage both you and the other person to feel better at ease. And learn to control your nervous  by a little laugh or jitter.

<b>Small Talk Goes A Long Way</b>.

" Conversations are based on verbal give and take..take a few minutes to learn something about the person you meet for the first time before you get together.., " mindtool

small talk does lead the conversation --  when I first  walked in to the interview room for my recent job, I saw an 3d origami object hanging at one of the building window and I expressed my interest in it, we start out our interview by talking about Origami and hobbies. 

<b>Be Positive</b>

" Your attitude shows through in everything you do...maintaining an upbeat manner and a smile."
-Being positive can help you to be calm and able to help you to solve problem better.

ex.My employer said that I might not be  qualified for the job because they think that after I graduate in a month, i will quit their par-time job and look for a full time position --My positive response was to assure them that I can be able commit to the part time job for a year and hopefully I can grow within the company for a full time position.


<b>Be Courteous And Attentive</b>

" It goes without saying that good manners and polite behavior  help make a good first impression. ..anything less can ruin the one chance you have at making that first impression. So be on your best behavior!" - mindtool

"turn off your mobile phone" Your new acquaintance deserves 100% of your attention. Anything less and you'll create a less than good first impression.

By following these tips, I hope that you can make a good first impression where ever you go and to whoever you meet.

Good luck !

Unconcious mind - Blink

Blink by Malcolm Cladwell --The Power of Thinking Without Thinking

Blink was written by Malcolm Cladwell-- one of my other favorite book where Malcolm Cladwell introduces us to the new philosophy -- The power of thinking without thinking.

This book explains the process of how we make decisions in life using our "unconscious mind " V.S. "Conscious mind". "Unconscious mind" where "Blink" explained that we should "trust our first instinct". Malcolm explained that we have a computer like system that run within us that we draw conclusion in every situation that we are in ,and these information process very fast, [like high speed internet'] that were based on our life experiences. where we don't need to think about it but we already have the solution -- the power of thinking "without thinking".

In another word where Jonathan Lasser stated in his article as-- "Rapid cognition is the sort of snap decision-making performed without thinking about how one is thinking, faster and often more correctly than the logical part of the band stated train can manage. Gladwell sets himself three tasks: to convince the reader that these snap judgments can be as good or better than reasoned conclusions. The argue is that the decisions that we are able to formula in the blink of an eye" an Unconcious mind" that most people would think would take a long time to draw careful conclusion can just as accurately a second or a blink of an eye. This rapid cognition of an opinion where Colman refer as--thin slicing, where someone uses their past experiences and expertise to form an opinion. A person can thin slice without even knowing that they are thin slicing. The book talks about how our adaptive unconscious is able to not only start to make these decisions for us without us being consciously aware but also our adaptive conscious is also able to send messages throughout our body that allows us to began to react without being consciously aware of why we’re reacting in a certain way. An example that can relate to this from my experience is Multiple choice exam. Every time I take an exam, when there are time left, i always reread the questions and changed my answers. the result is that the answers that I changed are always incorrect. my initial answers would be the right. Blinks expalins that when we read the questions, our unconscious mine already running inside us and work to draw a conclusions, if we come back again and questions our answers, then our unconscious mind would be confused.

"Malcolm Gladwell" also discuss of 'thin slicing' is arresting-- In a psychological experiment, normal people given fifteen minutes to examine a student's college dormitory can describe the subject's personality more accurately than his or her own friends. A cardiologist named Lee Goldman developed a decision tree that, using only four factors, evaluates the likelihood of heart attacks better than trained cardiologists in the Cook County Hospital emergency room in Chicago:

Peter Drucker-understand oneself

Managing Oneself by Peter Drucker

I always tell myself that nobody understand me better than I do, no body understand the reason why I act certain ways and do certain things, only me understand myself the best. However, I have never realized what is the meaning of “understanding myself” until I read the -- Managing oneself” by Peter Drucker. This has made me become self conscious that I have never really fully understood who I am. “The unexamined life is not worth living” by Socrates really get me thinking about how important it is to study and understand myself. I know that the first thing I need to do in order to become successful is to deeply understand who I really am and to learn how to manage myself. To learn what are my strengths and weaknesses as employees, a team member, a leader and what are my advantages and disadvantages. I also need to set up my personal plans and strategy, to marketing visibility plans about my brand, and to work on my SMART goals.

In the article “Managing oneself” Peter Drucker has brought up “The Five Most Important Questions”. Drucker’s questions are simple, but as is always found in Drucker’s writings, the simplicity is deceiving and the clarity of the questions forces you to reexamine your self. 1. What is my strength? 2. How do I perform? 3. What Are My Values? 4. Where Do I Belong? 5. What Should I Contribute? I have written a 20 pages self reflex based on this five questions and I have learn a lot about myself. So I believe after reading Peter Drucker article listed above and trying to answer the five Questions for yourself, you will truely understand who you are.

7 habits of effective people

The seven habits of highly effective people

This is a book I highly recommended everybody to read. This book is life changing for me-- Is beyond amazing ~ ! After reading this book, I have a totally different perspective about life and it totally helps me in developing my leadership skills in term of knowing my values, improve relationship with others, advance my working skills, and mostly understand what is important in life. According to businessball.com, this book is remarkably a set of inspirational and aspirational standards for anyone who seeks to live a full, purposeful and good life, and are applicable today more than ever, as the business world becomes more attuned to humanist concepts. 7 habits of effective people where Convey argues that life is made out of habits, and he is teaching us the 7 effective habits that will help us become successful in life. the Seven Habits of Highly Effective People are:

habit 1 - be proactive This is the ability to control one's environment, rather than have it control you--I often complain about how things doesn't go my ways, I am unlucky and ect.. but Convey explains that we can control our self and situation as long as we are proactive. EX. if I complain about how I don't have enough time to write blog-- a proactive action would be -- make time, plan, and prioritize.

habit 2 - begin with the end in mind Covey calls this the habit of personal leadership - leading oneself that is, towards what you consider your aims. What Convey also explains is that think of when you died. What do you want people to say at your funeral, what do you want them to remember you as? take time to deeply thinking about what you want other to remember you when you die will guide you to all the decisions you made early in life.

habit 3 - put first things first Covey calls this the habit of personal management. This is about organizing and implementing activities in line with the aims established in habit 2. Covey says that habit 2 is the first, or mental creation; habit 3 is the second, or physical creation.

habit 4 - think win-win> Covey calls this the habit of interpersonal leadership, necessary because achievements are largely dependent on co-operative efforts with others. He says that win-win is based on the assumption that there is plenty for everyone, and that if a decisions is not win-win situation for both then no deal should be done.

Habit 5 - seek first to understand and then to be understood Clear communication and empathy of listening is extremely powerful. Covey refer to as 'diagnose before you prescribe'. Empathy listening means that you should block everything from your mind and listen carefully what other have to say before you response. This is a skill not every body can archive but I rarely accomblished.

habit 6 - synergize Covey says this is the habit of creative co-operation - the principle that the whole is greater than the sum of its parts, which implicitly lays down the challenge to see the good and potential in the other person's contribution. habit 7 - sharpen the saw This is the habit of self renewal, says Covey, and it necessarily surrounds all the other habits, enabling and encouraging them to happen and grow. Covey interprets the self into four parts: the spiritual, mental, physical and the social/emotional, which all need feeding and developing.
www.businessballs.com website.

How to train your body --to sleep

So last night, was one of my I called it " miserable night" I always have the miserable night. It sucks so bad. I can not fall as sleep. I am getting so tired and my energy drain out. I just wish I can be like a little kid and sleep like a little kid. Some night I just laying in bed and not able to fall asleep. I don't know if you guys have the same problems as me. I have talked to a few friends of mine and find out that they do have the same problem. So I have came up with this theory is that most college students have problem of sleep here and there. I think this is because of our schedule of working and going to school and also partying at night that has messed up our sleeping schedule.

So if you are college students and have the same problems like I do then trying to train yourself to a better sleep. Our human body is just like any kind of animal-- it can be trained and untrained. So if you do the following tips from about.com-- I have tried this and it helps to train my body back to sleep.

1. Only Sleep and Have Sex in the Bedroom The bedroom should be used only for sleep and sex. That means no reading in bed and no TV in bed. Doing these things (or anything else) confuses your body, making it difficult to fall asleep. Give yourself about 15 minutes to fall asleep. If you haven’t fallen asleep by then, get out of bed until you are sleepy. You can do some quiet reading (pick something boring), but avoid TVs and computer screens. Remember, your goal is to train yourself to fall asleep quickly. Reading a stimulating book, watching TV or doing anything else undermines that.

2. Keep a Schedule Go to bed and wake up at the same time every day. This will train your body to sleep on a schedule. If you can maintain this schedule for several weeks, you will probably find yourself falling asleep faster and feeling more refreshed. Do not sleep in on weekends or stay up late. Your body adjusts to changes in your sleep schedule at a rate of one hour per day. That means if you wake up at 6:30 a.m. on weekdays, but 8:30 a.m. on weekends, you need two days to adjust. You won’t be sleeping well again until Wednesday each week.

3. Make a Bedtime Ritual Create a nightly ritual to signal that it is time to sleep. Start the ritual about 30 minutes before you lie down to help release stressful thoughts and be ready to sleep when you lie down. A little quiet reading (not in bed) or a warm bath can be great. Avoid watching TV, since it stimulates your brain.

4. Exercise Daily Daily exercise will improve your chances of falling asleep quickly and sleeping deeply. Try to exercise early in the day and never within three hours of bedtime. Exercising too late in the day can make it difficult for you to fall asleep. A daily exercise habit will not only improve your sleep hygiene, but it will also improve your overall health.

5. Get Some Sunlight Sunlight helps regulate your circadian clock and make you feel sleepy at night by stimulating your body to produce melatonin (a hormone that regulates your sleep cycle). You need exposure to bright light every day. Morning sunlight exposure can be especially helpful. Be sure to open the drapes every morning to let light in.

6. Avoid Caffeine in the Afternoon Some people are caffeine sensitive and cannot drink any coffee, tea or other caffeinated beverage up to six hours before bedtime. If you are having trouble sleeping, try avoiding all afternoon and evening caffeine.

7. Make Your Bedroom Dark The contrast between light during the day and dark at night helps reinforce your body’s natural rhythms. By making your bedroom dark at night, you will be able to fall asleep faster and stay asleep longer. Closing drapes and doors can help reduce the light in your bedroom.

8. Avoid Alcohol That small glass of wine can make it more difficult to stay asleep. After an evening drink, you might fall asleep just fine, but you will likely wake up in the middle of the night. This effect is caused by a rebound in blood sugar and withdrawal from the alcohol after it is metabolized. Try avoiding alcohol before sleep and see if you sleep more soundly. For every drink you have, give your body at least an hour to process it before trying to fall asleep. 9.

The nicotine in cigarettes is a stimulant that will keep you awake, which is just one of the things that smoking does to your body. If you smoke, many resources are available to help you quit. The benefits quitting include better sleep, a longer life, more energy and saving money. Smokers also may wake up early due to nicotine withdrawal.

10. See a Doctor Finally, if these lifestyle changes don’t help, contact your doctor. You may have a sleep disorder or just may need some temporary help getting yourself in good ‘sleep shape.’ More on Improving Your Sleep

How to nail interview

How to nail an Interview Many of us in Senior positions are actively seeking for a job, and so prepare for an interview can become in handy. In my case of today, I just went through an interview, usually I would prepare a lot before hand so I do good in an interview. I don't want to look bad or mumbling when the employer asked questions that I could not answer. It is always nerve racking going to interview, however, I kinda like the feeling of it-- i like to be asked questions and selling myself and I know the more I go through the interview, the better I am at it. I have been to quite a few interviews, and most of the time, I did good-- I think. Even today, I think I did good too. But after going home from then interview, I feel like I could have done better

I forgot about the essential key of leadership, observe and Listen. I was trying so hard to sell myself during the interview, the manager said, "Serena I like the interview but the problems is that I am afraid you are graduating soon and we do not offer full time position in at least a year. I am staid you can not commit and we don't want to waste time training someone and after a few months they leave. " .. I did not really listen to his concerns. I was just going on and on how I can am a perfect candidate and I can perform the job well, I think I did not even trying to response to his concerns.

The Essence of Leadership Traits

What are the keys to become a great leaders ? 1-Develop a service of attitude -- customer is not a department , it's the attitude -- service is the life blood of any organization, everything flow from it and nourished by it. 2-Love what you do -- many things will catch your eyes, but few will catch your heart 3-Focus priorities -- Focus on critical few, not significant many 4-Understand the soft stuff-- there are things more important than money and sex-- recognition and praised 5-Build your brand --in the race of quality, there's no finish line 6-Embrace humor and optimism --optimism is the faith that lead to achievement 7-Commit to excellence -- excellence is not an act, It's and habit 8-Take risk-- don't be afraid to go. Out the limp, that is where the fruit is 9-Reinforce core values -- things that matter most must never mercy the things that matter least 10-Earn trust -- trust, not technology, is the issues of decade --Tom Peter 11-Take action -- you can not discover new ocean unless You have the courage to lose sight of the shore -- 12-Aim for the heart-- because they don't care how much you know, until they know how much you care

How to be come a leader not follower

I was trying to find an article that I can write a response to and these article, how to become a leader not follower has came a crossed me twice. I clicked on it and reading for a little bit, it catch my attention. The article is kind of related to myself. I am in my mid twenties, and here I am, trying to figure how to lead my life, to become a leader, and lead myself to have a happy life.

How to become a leader was written by Steve Hill. Steve was talking about how most people are follower and they are happy with it; however, he pointed out that most successful people are the one who take lead and control their life. " The most successful people are leaders and make things happen for themselves by taking a positive attitude and through working very hard to reach their goals." Steve said that while he was not happy with his current job and was looking for something else that suited his skills. he went to a job conference where they have a role play of whom ever they want to be and have to act in certain ways. And when he said that he picked the chairman positions, he felt empowered, stronger and he felt like a leader, not a follower anymore. Please read this interesting article, I thought it would help if you want to become a leader, not follower. Can we help you find something? SEARCH: Main PageMember CenterView AuthorsRSS FeedsTerms of ServiceContacts Home Conditions / Disabilities Aids / HIV Allergies Alzheimer's Disease Arthritis Asthma Back / Spine Blood Disorders Cancer Chronic Fatigue Syndrome Chronic Pain Cold Diabetes Digestive Disorders Ear, Nose, Throat Disorders Eating Disorders Endocrine Disorders Eye Disorders Genetic Disorders Genitourinary Disorders Hair Loss Headaches Heart Disease Hemorrhoids Infectious Diseases Liver Disorders Lung Diseases Mouth / Dental Disorders Multiple Sclerosis Musculoskeletal Disorders Neurological Disorders Parkinson's Disease Sexual Diseases Skin Conditions Sleep Disorders Stress Viral Diseases Environment Family Babies Health Insurance Home Kids / Teens Parenting Pet's Health Relationships Travel / Leisure Fitness / Wellness Aging Beauty Bodybuilding Diets Endurance Sports Exercising Food / Drink Nutrition Recreation / Sports Reproductive Health Strength Training Weight Loss Medical History Medicine Acupuncture Alternative Medicine Home Remedies Medicinal Herbs Meditation Nursing Orthopedics Pediatrics Physical Therapy Plastic Surgery Podiatry Sports Medicine Yoga Men's Health Andropause Men Related Prostate Mental Health AD / HD Anxiety Autism Bipolar Disorder Depression Panic Disorders Paranoia Phobias Psychology Schizophrenia Miscellaneous Recovery / Addiction Alcoholism Smoking Cessation Substance Abuse Self Improvement / Motivation Society Women's Health Menopause Menstruation Pain Pregnancy Women Related  »  Home  »  Self Improvement Motivation  »   Learn To Become A Leader Not A Follower By Steve Hill | Self Improvement Motivation | Rating: Most people in life are happy to follow the lead of other people, to sit on the fence in a debate or have the attitude of hiding at the back of the class. The most successful people are leaders and make things happen for themselves by taking a positive attitude and through working very hard to reach their goals. We are all able to become leaders and this article may help you to achieve this status. I grew up as a very nervous person, who had very little self-confidence and who was very shy. I was not happy being this way and often felt jealous of other people who were happy to speak up and take control of tasks and situations. I wanted to be one of these leaders and not the follower that I certainly had become. In my early twenties, I decided that the time had arrived to make a series of life changing decisions. I was determined to have a happy and successful life and was aware that I needed to change my whole attitude and approach to life. I was not happy at where I worked and joined an employment agency in an attempt to find alternative employment. In the reception area of the agency, I started speaking to a man who was also their hoping to find a different job. His name was Mark and we got on well and wished each other the best of luck in our quest to find work. We even exchanged phone numbers and vowed to keep each other up to date with our progress. I was then interviewed by a man who explained his plan to help me to find this new role of work. He was very bright, clever and positive and had many interesting ideas. He seemed very confident that I would soon be employed for a different company more suited to the skills which I had. At one stage of the meeting he described the scenario of a group interview. He suggested that we may be ushered into a large room with a big table. As we sat down there would be a sheet of paper asking the group to debate a particular subject. He stated that all of the people in the room would be in the same position, all looking for work, all nervous, however that in that room I could be whoever I wanted to be. He said that I needed to stand up and take the lead by stating that I would act as chairman and that if anyone had a comment that they wanted to make, that they could raise their hand. If I did this I would show my prospective employer that I was a leader. I went home and thought about this and did not believe I had it in me to act in the way that he wanted me to, as I was not a leader. Later that evening Mark phoned and all he was talking about was the group interview scenario. He also stated that there was no way that he would be able to stand up either in the way that had been described. I did not have to ever attend a group interview, but Mark did. He surprised himself by carrying out the advice and stated that after he had said his initial statement about being the chairman, that he had never felt so powerful and in control. For the rest of the day other members of the group had been regularly asking him questions as if he was some sort of team leader. He was very proud of himself and I am happy to report that he was successful at that interview and is very happy in his new position. He has also taken the success and learning experience into his social life and states that he has never had a higher self-esteem. I am very pleased for him as he is a genuine person who works very hard. He is also one of only a few friends that I can honestly say that I trust. I have taken inspiration from Mark and have entered into a career of helping people who stutter, to achieve fluency. This is something which I really enjoy and which gives me a large amount of job satisfaction. I am also far more confident than I ever have been and have at last found happiness. In conclusion we all have it in us to be a leader. We need to be brave and determined to take control and remember that all we can do in life is to try our best. We are only sure about living one life, so lets be happy and not accept second best. Be a leader in life, not a follower.

MOTIVATION

Motivation is the most essential way that lead to success. Why am I saying that? This is because if a person is not motivated, they tend to be very lazy, not proactive, and especially not happy at what they dO. The result is that you will not produce good result at what you do, not meeting the time line, and feeling unmotivated. And that is how I feel most of the time and I know most people do too. It is not easy for a person feel motivated, only if you are the lucky to be the one that truly know you love to do and have the job that you are passionate about.



A good example of unmotivation is from one of my favorite movie--Office Space. Where Peter quotes that-- you know it is not that I am lazy, it's just that I don't care. Peter has been working for a fortune 500 company and does not like his job. For the entire work, he said that he only spend fifteen minutes of real work for a week. And the rest of the time he just play game, doing nothing and zoned out for an hour. Peter has no motivation to work. He hate his job. And you don't want to stuck in the same situation as him.

I know that it is hard to feel motivated all the time. but if you have no energy, lazy and feeling useless, try one of these tips that I get from zenhabits.com
This articles provide a 16 ways to get yourself motivated, and I think it is very helpful. so when you feel like you are lazy and unmotivated try this.

1. Start one goal at a time--select the most important goal that you think you need to change or accomplished. Setting goals is very important to help yourself feeling motivated; however, don't try to archive too many goals at the same time. Select a small goal that is meaningful and worth archiving for yourself first. Zenhabits.com suggested that when he feel unmotivated is when he had too many goals or too much going on in his life. I agree with what he have said, I tried to dedicated my self to a 100 days lead project that I have set out 4 goals that I want to accoblished in 100 days. I was very motivated for the first week-- i feel very great about myself, my four goals are to wakeup and going to sleep at the same time everyday, exercise right when i woke up, trying to finished one book in a month, and lastly, writing journal every day before I go to sleep. After the first week, I feel exhausted, and could not archive four goals the same time and then I came back to feel unmotivated again. This is because I feel overload. And the unaccoblishment has drained myself out.

2. Find inspiration -- Zenhabits.com said that finding inspiration through reading sucessful stories about the goals you want to archieve. This way will giving you hopes that if other can do it, you can too. A silly example from my experience experience would be --I want to get myself in good shape, skinny, toned legs and abs , and so I tried to read how Victoria Secret Models exercise routine is like to get the inspiration to maybe get to where they are.

3. Get excited-- the goal you choose has to be very meaningful to you so that when you think about that goal, you get very excited about it. This is very important because if you are not very excited with the goal you trying to archive-- the result is you don't even want to start. One way for me to get excited about the goal is to think of the result and feeling of achievement-- I would feel like a Victoria secrets model after my 100 days of exercise.


4. Build anticipation -- zenhabits suggest that when you want to archive a goal, don't start immidistely, he said wait for it, even a week or month later, to set a date, make it excited and have more time for you to draw your strategy of archiving that goal. I think this might be a good idea-- I start my goals right away and then slowly writing strategy how I can archive my goals.

5.Post your goal-- make a few words of your goal (ex. read Blink for 30 mins )and post it on your wall, refrigerator, work, Ect. Make it within your sight so you can see it all the time. I wrote mine on a white board in my room, so I am able to see it when I wake up and go in my room. This help to constantly reminded me about my goal

6. Make it publicly-- talk to your friends, parents, and others about your goal.. This is because people don't like look bad in front of others. Making your goal public helps you to push yourself harder in archiving that goal because you don't want to look like a liar

7.Think about it daily-- this help to easier be committed to it. Get excited and posted on your wall help constantly thinking about that goal-- the more you think about it-- the more you are committed to it.

8. Get support-- archive goal alone is hard, you should get help from others.. I want to get help from my friends to go running or biking with me, go to yoga instructor and take real class.

9. Realize that motivation comes and then go-- if there are time you feel unmotivated, it is totally normal, just try to start yourself and be committed. No body can feel motivated all the time. So don't be too harsh on yourself.

10. Stick with it. Don't give up. If you don't feel motivated, just try to start again. I wasn't able to follow the steps that reach to my goals, but I didn't give it. I give myself an extension-- instead of 100 days would be to thanks giving, I subtracted to days I did not follow my goals and now my 100 days self motivation project has extended to Christmas.

11. Start small, really small. When you are tying to exercise, you don't have to work out 5 days a week starting out.. A two or three minutes starting would work. For me, everyday I woke up, I took out my yoga Matt, sometime I sat there for half an hour stretching and crunching and doing yoga, other times I just sat there and stretch for 5 minutes. I guess as long as you are start doing something, in a long run, it will become a habits. As long as you start-- it's all good.

12. Build on small success- as long as you are doing something small-- exercise for 5 mins in the morning -- I feel good about myself already. Everyday it gives me more confident and feel good about myself. Now I start running for half to an hour a day, twice a week. Feeling awesome

13. Think about the benefits, not difficult-- think about the positive. If you do this you get that. I always thinking about how exercise make me feel happier. I don't like to push myself too hard, when I go running, I walk slow when I feel tired. No need to push myself to hard. I just think about it as enjoying the nature outside and getting some fresh air -- ahhh

14. Call for help when you don't feel motivated. Surround yourself with people that serve the goals you are trying to archive-- need a running buddy?call your friends !

Aha ! Leadeership

Possible topics that I will be writing about leadership:
1. Understand ones self- Drucker
2. Life made out of habits - Stephen Convey
3. MOTIVATION 
3. Communicating - General Management Skills /Mind tool
4. Listening- General Magerial Skills /mind tool
5. Understanding the unconscious mind - Blink
6. Power- sources of power - General Managerial Skill
7. Three level of leadership - Clawson

>> I will relate all these topic in everyday life>> call it the Aha ! movement !
>> I will find the sources of material to back it up>>
>> I will try to keep the same Ethos -<< picturing>> or sounding consistent
>>write down what I <-thought, read, and head ->
>> Pay attention to my blog culture >> create culture>> charactoristic >. values>> Be consistant..consistant !!

>> Confident voice.. how to become confident?? do the home work. read read think think write write !!

Controversy

Leadership Controversies

The  controversies that I found in leadership topic are:
1. Abusive the power of leadership

I believe the abusive the power leadership is common controversy about leadership. Once one understand the power of leadership, it is really hard for one not to abuse it. Leadership can enable one to tell other what to do, influence other people in the way that you want them to be. therefore, so many people have abuse the influence that they have.There are a lot leader get to the successful position and abuse their power to corrupt, mislead, and controlling that are on the news. Another example that I had done a case study about is Tyco International former CEO, Dennis Kozlowski. He had tremendously successful lead Tyco International http://www.wsws.org/articles/2002/jun2002/tyco-j18.shtml and become one of the top and successful CEO in America, and yet he abuse his power as CEO a took a large amount of Tyco Company money and involved in fraudulent which were $400 million in lost company funds.


2. The question about whether leadership is moral or not.
The other controversy  that I found about leadership topic is whether leadership is ethical or not. This is because sometime when once understand the power of leadership, leader can start to use it to manipulate people to tell them what to do. This is because leadership is about understanding one needs and desires to motivate and influence a person. In my past leadership class that I took, there are three level of leaderships which consider to be the body, head, and heart. The first level is simply what other say or do, the things that are observable of ones' visible behaviors,  the body. The second level of leadership is conscious thoughts, how they think and their cognitive ability, the head. And lastly, the third level is a person set of values, assumptions, beliefs, and expectations about the way the world is, the heart, and they said that if a leader are well trained and observe long enough, they can see through his followers through the mind to the heart. The three level of leadership by James G. Clawson stated that " leaders attempted to influences level two and three are unethical and invasion of privacy." Clawson gave an example of Skinnerian view B.F. Skinner, the famous psychologist. Skinner was able to conduct a research which said that we can managing human and animal to behave in a certain ways by reward them differently. He put the chicken in to a box with buttons for an experiment,  and when the chicken peaked on the button, Skinner rewarded it with corns, and he was able to trained the chicken to peak in a certain way that he wanted by reward them differently; therefore, Clawson concluded that leadership in level two and three are the invasion of ones' private life and it is not ethical to manipulate ones' behaviors. 

3. The dark side of leadership
 

Why Leadership?

Last semester, I was introduced to leadership class and fell in love with it. Learning about leadership has help me to develop the understanding of living and leading my life. Before I did not know what is the purpose of life. I feel that I have no direction and lost control. Every morning I wake up, I hate going to school and then go to work. The only thing I look forward is going out and have fun with my friends. Years pass by and I did not feel that I have accomplish anything.

But last semester was different for me. I actually love going to class and learn. I read before going to class, participate in class discussion, and school never feel so fun. And it was a Leadership class that I feel so inspired. I think Leadership is like a form of Art. It is so beautiful and powerful. It is beautiful because once understanding leadership, it can help a person to live life meaningfully. It is powerful once understand leadership traits and skills, that person can see the underlying forces to influence others, to tell them what to do and influence them in a good way.


At first I have many doubts about writing this topic because I think not that many people are going to read my blog; However, I think leadership is very important to life and I hope that by writing about leadership can help raise more awareness that can help impact on others.


The other reason why I decided to about leadership is because I want read, practice, and develop my leadership skills. see

Also I think leadership touches every thing in our daily life. From our habits of everything we do, interacting with ones an others, our actions and decisions in life to planning, AND ACHIEVING DREAMS..

Leadership is Influence. My other reason why I love leadership so much is because it can influence other people around you. Before I always blame life why can't it be this way or that way, now I understand leadership can help me to lead your own life. It help me to control the direction and the relationship where I want it to be with others. Also once I build leadership in myself, it can also help me to influence others that are important to me. To have a good relationship with my family and friends. Have you ever been in situation that you do not have good relationship with your parents,lovers, friends and coworkers? This is because maintain good relationship with others require good leadership skills. or it is the other ways around, maintain good relationship is very important to become a leader. this is because if no body like you, no one is goin g to listen to you. Leadership can influence other people to do what you say. In a positive way though because once you understand the art of leadership, you can manipulate others to do what you say, that is the abusive of leadership power to manipulate one's actions.

Links 2 Leaderhip !!

Top ten links about Leadership !


http://mindtools.com/

Mindtools.com is my most favorite website to learn about leadership. I have found this website from last semester when I have an interested in leadership, and ever since then, I have been visiting this website on my regularly basis. Mindtools.com provides over 600 skill sets to learn about leadership, team building, communication, and career skills.  In addition to those articles, mindtools.com also provide effective toolkits and self assessment relatively to those leadership topics, I found these toolkits and self assessment to be very easy to learn how to develop leadership skills. The assessments also tell me to see what levels I am at. I also found mindtools.com is even more powerful than any of the leadership textbooks that I have learned in school. The information in this website is very resourceful and the design of the resources to read is very easy to understand and learn from.


http://www.leadershipnow.com/index.html
Leadershipnow.com  is another website that I found very powerful to read about leadership. What I like leadershipnow.com is it emphasizes about the important of leadership and why ones need to develop leadership traits in them. What I found about this website also interesting  is it has different categories to read about leadership; an example is when I click on leadership quotes, I found a list of all leadership quotes only. I like reading quotes and learn from them. I think it is easier to learn from an interesting quote and remember it than reading a whole article or book about one topic. Leadershipnow.com also has the leadership books categories, when I clicked on it, a list of leadership books showed up. As my interested in leadership, I want to find powerful books to read about leadership; this website has a whole list of them . Lastly, if I want to read about leadership blog, I just need to click on blogging. I like leadershipnow.com that is very straight forward.  I can easily focus on what I feel like reading at the moment just by clicking on different categories.

http://www.learn-to-be-a-leader.com/index.html
learn-to-be-a-leader.com is a website teaching people to become a leader in a very simple and short sense of writing. The topics in this website are very straightforward, and the author also has facts and histories included in his writing, so I guess in a sense that you can figure out where and from whom are the topics came from. I like this website, it is kind of like an analytically about  leadership that the author has sources out the essential characteristics and  teaches how to become a leader.

http://www.forbes.com/leadership/
I read this website because I can find the most updated news about leaders that is happening with the current successful companies and the traits of leadership of those successful CEOs and other tips to become a better leader. I guess this has given me the application of leadership development and the result of being a leader( like those successful CEOs) 

http://www.nwlink.com/~donclark/leader/leader.html
When I search about leadership, this linked always shows up many times regard of different titles I searched for. nwlink.com is created by Donald Clark, and it has been on the internet over 15 years.  This website has a full coverage about leadership topics where it provides information and knowledge in performance, learning and training for leadership.

http://top7business.com/?Top-7-Leadership-Skills-for-Business-Success&id=3632
The top7business.com website is another resourceful place to read ab0ut leadership development. I like how all the title of the posts are starting with top 7. The design of this website is very easy to read and remember because all the posts are stated with top 7s, an example of the post top 7 leadership skills for business success. After finished reading this post I already remembered the 7 leadership skills to become successful are adaptability, self awareness, people skills, decisiveness, purposefulness, collaborate skills and executive and innovative. This is very simple, easy to memorize, and understand.

http://www.businessballs.com/index.htm
This website teaches ethical learning and development resource for people and organizations. It doesn't really mainly to focus on leadership but it has resources which teaches people to become successful in business. I really enjoy reading the posts in this website because it explains in detail about each topics, what it is, the important and benefit of each topics, and then the steps of how to archive them. I have the feeling that I will commit to read this site. It will become my influences on my writing about leadership.

http://www.emergingleader.com/article31.shtml
What brought me to this website is the 20 ways to become a leader posts. the topic does explain itself. this blog also has a linked to leadership blog which I found pretty old, back to 2006 posts. reading the blog maybe it will give me idea of maybe how to approach or write my blog about leadership. besides blog they also have categories talk about leadership.
 
http://life.halcode.com/archives/2008/04/13/the-7-attributes-of-leadership/
http://www.greatleadershipbydan.com/
http://prinpink.wordpress.com/tag/leadership/
This website is created by Dan. after reading a few posts by Dan I was very inspired by how